Deflecting Questions You Do Not Want To Answer

     "Just because someone asks you a question, does not mean that you have to answer it if you do not want to do so."  advised John Thomas Reid.

     "Most people feel obligated to answer even when they do not like either the question or the person asking the question."

     Of course, there are some legal and medical questions that require an answer, but those are not the annoying ones.

     It was in a supermarket that I overheard a woman standing nearby say to another, "I still can't believe what Betty asked me yesterday, I didn't want to tell her, but what could I do?"

     So I told them John's advice and what she could have done.

     1 ~ Do not answer, instead in a pleasant tone ask a simple question of her.  ~ "Why do you ask?"

     This unexpected response usually results in a flustered response of, "er, a, um, well."

  You can quickly follow that by firmly stating, "Tell me, I really want to know." ~ If you do want to know.

     Or if you have no interest in her reasons because what she asked is none of her business but you still want to maintain a relationship with her.
     2 ~ Change the subject quickly.

     Say something like, "I heard a clever riddle that I know you will appreciate, what stays in one corner but can travel around the world?  I know with your love of travel (if she does) you would like this, the answer is ~ a stamp.  Isn't that clever?"  Then ask her about her vacation, a subject most people enjoy describing.
     3 ~ Leave, just simply say 'I must leave now.'  Then do so, no matter what she says.

                                                               

 

     I was in a store when I encountered a woman who had taken one of my adult school courses several years earlier.  After greetings, she said, "May I ask you a question?"

     "Yes" I answered.

     "How old are you?"

     I told her that I affirmed that all was well in her life.

     She asked "Aren't you going to answer my question?"

     Aha, there is now another question that will often distract from the first one.

     I answered, "No."

     "But I just asked you."

     "You asked if you could ask me a question, to which I said yes you could ask me a question.  You did not ask if I would answer the question that you next asked.

     "Well, will you answer my question?"

     "Which one?" I responded.

     "Oh, never mind, nice to see you." she said as she went on her way.

 

 

You Need Not Answer All The Questions

That You Are Asked

I Am Your Brain, Why Are You Sabotaging Me?

     How would you like it if you had important thoughts and ideas to tell, but you were never given an opportunity to get a sentence or even a word out, before you were drowned, by voices and/or music (usually with words) of others?

     Why do you consider what comes from the brains of other people to be superior to me, your very own wonderful Brain?

     Your lack of respect for my multitude of knowledge and talents is difficult to believe.

     How can you know of the music, the meaningful information for others, the poetry and all the other aspects of me, if you always smother me?

     I need times of quietness, not bombardment.  In quiet times, you can ask me to make known to you your many past lives for you have had them and aspects of some carry over into your current life whether you believe it or not.

     You sleep with a radio turned on, the television is set to act as your alarm clock in the morning and share your breakfast time, before turning it off, you put that dreadful, very harmful to me, 'thing' with the electromagnetic fields, close to me  on one of your ears so that I will not have even a second of time alone with you.

     And so it continues all day, in your car or public transportation, people talking, but never, ever any us-time.

     If you keep insulting me, I will start retreating within, some will term it "memory loss," but there is nothing wrong with my memory, it is the years of being unwanted except for selected duties.

     Soon I will hibernate deep within myself
         where no one will ever be able to find me again ~ but know
              that I, your Brain, tried,
                                  I really tried ~
                                         but you never listened,
                                                           you never ever
                                                                            listened.

"The Failure To Have Never Failed Is A Major Failure"

     This major life learning lesson is by an unknown author. 8/20/14

     There was a great deal of snow that winter and the separate garage of our family's house was connected to the street by a very long driveway.

     A snow plow could not be used because not only was there no place to pile the pushed snow, but also the driveway surface was crushed stone, therefore, my Father had always shoveled it, but now he was recovering from a heart attack.

     Although making many telephone calls, Mother was unable to locate anyone to shovel ~ but the driveway had to be cleared.  So very tall, thin, little energy, un-athletic me had to do it.

     Following my Father's advise, I slowly lifted the snow off in layers.  Mother monitored my progress and insisted that I come in the house for a rest every 20 minutes.

     At winter's end, there had been six major snow storms and I had shoveled during all of them.

     To utilize my now strong muscles to the best advantage, I decided to join the canoe club to which many of my friends belonged, but in order to do so, I had to take and pass a Red Cross canoe course.  I did not anticipate any problem for I was a good swimmer (and could float on my back for long periods of time, even doze while doing so) and I knew how to correctly paddle and steer a canoe.

     However, it was the final test that was the real test ~ while alone in a canoe, in deep water ~ to get out of the canoe without getting any water in it and while holding on to it with one hand, which ruled out jumping or diving from it.

     Then, while in the water, to get back into the canoe without taking half of the lake in the canoe while doing so.

     Eventually all the class members graduated except for three of us, but the instructor allowed us to return to keep trying.

     One of our three gave up and the other mastered the technique ~ and I still struggled.  Never had I been so determined to succeed, but I was beginning to be discouraged.

     One day, after another unsuccessful half hour, a woman who was helping me get the canoe out of the water, commented "Sorry you failed again."

     Most fortunately, my instructor heard the comment and said words that I have always remembered ~

     "No, she has not failed, she has come closer to success."

     With that encouragement, I took the canoe out again and was able to finally do both maneuvers correctly ~ thus qualifying me for my Red Cross Certification.  There were many enjoyable trips with my friends.

     A well known saying is ~

"If at first you do not succeed

try, try, try again."

 

     The author wisely did not write ~ try again ~ or even ~ try, try again, but instead knew that for some people (like me) extra effort would be needed.

 

     The repetition of the word ~ try ~ compensates for the fact that it is a weak, insecure, maybe-ish word.

 

     What loose strings of projects and endeavors are hanging from your life?  Did you stop after encountering a knot or three?

 

     Start the project again, avoid saying that you are going back to it, back is past, go forward with your project perhaps, finding another way of doing it.

 

     On the street facing sign board of a small rural church were these important words ~

 

"Failure is the beginning of success."

Have A Happy ~ ~

     On a nightly news television program, there was a Weather Woman who ended each of her reports with ~ "Have a happy ~ ~"

     I liked the concept and started using it.

     Its specialness lies in the fact that it is unlimited.

The usual parting wishes have a time limit.
                      ~ "Have a nice day."
                                      What about tomorrow? 
                                      Or the next day?
                      ~ "Have a nice evening."
                                      How long is an evening? 
                                      When does an evening become a night?

     The narrowness of these wishes infers that when a day becomes an evening or an evening becomes night that the wisher does not care what happens thereafter.

     While the words ~ Have a happy ~ ~ opens all sorts of possible coming happiness; they trigger the mind of the receiver to numerous types of 'happys' that could be selected.

     Focusing on the good and the happy will usually bring it into being.

     Make your wishes to others wide, avoid the narrow.

Therefore, I most sincerely say to you,

the reader of these words

 

Have A Happy ~ ~

    

Good Advice From Friends

        "Never talk to anyone who is counting your money," advised Lloyd Morgan.  "If they want to talk while they count their money, let them."
        In a busy, small restaurant, I encountered a cashier, who could have benefited from that advice.  Having finished eating, I had stood in line, then had handed to the cashier, my check and money that required ten dollars in change.  I had not spoken to him, nor had he spoken to me as he was talking non-stop to the man standing behind me in the line. 
        He barely glanced at the money as he hurriedly collected the change from the cash register and thrust it into my hand. 
        After looking at the money, I told him that he had given me the wrong amount.  I repeated it twice, the second time speaking louder than before.
        For the first time, he looked at me and said so loudly, and harshly that everyone in the restaurant stopped talking.  "Lady, I never make mistakes, I've been doing this for twenty years.  Leave, you're holding up the line!"
        Speaking loudly so that everyone could hear, I said, "I have tried twice to tell you, but you ignored me, so if you never make mistakes, I want to thank you for giving me $50 in change instead of the expected $10."
        I waved the $50 bill above my head as I went out the door, his now nicer, but frantic voice followed me out, "Lady, come back, come back."

---------------------------------------------------

        Marian Thurwell of Australia advises, "During the day, but especially at night, when walking on a city sidewalk, always walk in the center, not on the edges."

        "If you walk too close to a building, it is easy for someone to grab you and quickly pull you into an open doorway."

        "If you walk too close to the curb, it is also easy for someone to open a car door to block your way, then to pull you into a car."

        "But this can be avoided if you always walk so that your are facing on-coming car traffic, this ensures that parked cars are facing the same direction.  In other words, always walk from the front of parked cars towards the rear, so that if a car door is opened, the door is between you and the person opening the door.

        "Any place." Marian continued, "where sidewalks adjoin buildings and you want to turn at the corner, never blindly walk around the corner without first knowing who is on the other side."

        "Always, with no hesitation, walk to the curb first, then while appearing to be looking both ways for traffic, look at the sidewalk where you want to walk.  If in doubt, cross the street and turn there."

        It is best to avoid possible unsafe areas, but if you find yourself in such an area, review Marian's advice first, then proceed with confidence.

Bring Worthwhile Changes Into Your Life

Albert Einstein said,

"The definition of craziness

is doing the same thing all the time

and expecting a different result"

     Are you one of the many people who bemoan the fact that life is always the same?

     Or are there too many happenings and you long for serenity?

     Do you want a better job or even a job?  And you have taken all the standard, recommended actions until there seems that nothing else can be done ~ or so it is thought.

     No matter what it is, it can be obtained, as long as it is for the highest good for all concerned.

     Start by never, ever using the word ~ change ~ alone.  Most people translate the word to mean something good, but since the dictionary defines the word as ~ "to alter," it can mean undesirable or bad as well as good.

     Use a descriptive word before the word, such as ~ a wonderful change, a highly desired change, an often wanted change.

     Listen to yourself and ask others to tell you whenever you use that word, so that you can become aware of how you are using it.

Obviously avoid putting any so-called negative words in front of it.

     The best and most constant Word Referees are your children;  they delight in the opportunity to tell you what you have done incorrectly ~ and they will be more careful with what they say.

     God, Higher Power, Universal Knowledge seems to require proof that people really mean what they say that they want.

     There is a simple way to provide that proof, that is to daily make small good changes in your life and surroundings.

     As you do each be certain to say, even if very softly just for you, this affirmation, (or something similar) ~

I welcome, appreciate and am thankful for the positive changes

that are coming into my life

before the end of next month or sooner.

     Be certain to state a time period, otherwise, that which is headed to you could get delayed.

     Some simple, small, good changes that can be made are:

          ~ In the kitchen, move the plates that have always resided on the right side of the shelf over to the left side.

          ~ Change the position of one or more objects on your dresser top.

          ~ When your dog takes you for your daily walk, instead of turning right as you two have always done, turn left instead.

          ~ Part your hair on the other side.

          ~ Grow a beard ~(not suggested for women)

          ~ On a bookshelf, stack 3 books horizontally instead of vertically, then use that flat surface on which to display a favorite object.

          ~ Next month, interchange that object with another.

          ~ Drive home from work by a different route, turn off your GPS, find your own route, if you get so-called ~ lost ~ wonderful!

          ~ Buy a flowering house plant, then closely watch the changes it makes.

     Make certain that you determine the small relocations yourself, no hints from other people are allowed, make certain that family (especially spouses) and friends know that to do so could jeopardize the whole procedure, invalidating it all.

     Every time you see a positive change that you have made, be pleased with yourself for having done so.

     An Astrologist advised that on New Year's Day of every year, to ensure a good future, that one should move 27 things.

     Remeber what Albert Einstein said

          and this smart, unknown author of:

"If you always do,

                           what you have always done,

     You will always get,

                                      what you always got."

     Every morning say to yourself:

          Direct me to other good changes

 that will prove to Higher Power and me

that I am ready for the next successful phase of my life.







    



What Color Are Your Mother's Eyes?

     Surprising ~ and sad ~ are the many people who say, "No idea" or "I never noticed," or worse yet "I'm not interested in that sort of thing."
     Those were the eyes that were seen from birth thru babyhood, childhood and usually much of adulthood.

     What other aspects of life are being missed because of unawareness?

     Some people seem to be born with an attunement to all that is around them or have wise parents, who thru their own actions daily provide and teach examples of awareness and the importance of it.

     Today start to become more aware for:

~ Enjoyment
        ~ Especially of Nature
                    ~ Dew like diamonds on an intricate spider web
                    ~ A boldly colored sunset sky
                    ~ The chirping of unseen birds at sunrise

~ Safety
            ~ Thru the years, there have been tragic fires in theaters, restaurants and arenas where many people died because the majority had rushed to the entrance door.  They had failed to be aware of the clearly marked, red lighted EXIT signs over doors along the sides of the building.
            ~ When entering a public place, make it automatic to locate all the EXIT doors first.  If possible, sit near one of the doors, then relax. 
            ~ The most unsafe areas are the middle of a room and the middle of a row of seats.
            ~ When first entering an airplane, count the seats both forward and back of yours to the exit doors.
            ~ Note the members on a paper napkin and put it in an easily available pocket, better yet memorize the number of seats.

~ Helpfulness to Others
            ~ Be aware of some simple ways that you can aid someone ~ a person, an animal, plants, and the Earth.

      Today start a ~ My New Awareness Listing ~.  Date each entry and the time, list what you became aware of, perhaps, for the first time.

Example:
June 1, 2014 ~ Noon ~
               While eating my lunch sandwich outside , I saw a black Ant trying to carry a much too large for him bread crumb, he finally rolled it through the grass and down a hole.  Amazing!

Repeatedly Say

~ Each day, I am becoming more aware of all that is ~

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