While
waiting at the airport for my flight to arrive, I chatted with a woman and her
young child and asked how the child liked flying. The mother replied, “Oh, we're not flying,
we're waiting for someone. Then she
added firmly, “I could never fly.”
Her
words have often surfaced in my mind, along with thoughts about how often
people limit themselves and their lives by proclamations such as hers.
While
flying is not my, nor many other peoples, most favorite thing to do, by doing
we have not only overcome a challenge but have, also, afforded ourselves great
benefits not possible with other modes of transportation.
Listen
to yourself, do you ever say, “I'm afraid to do that.” or “I'd be afraid to do
that.” Of the two, the second is worse
because it shows an anticipated fear, while the first one shows a current fear.
Although,
they seem similar upon first encountering, the words, “I wouldn't do that!” are
quite different. For there can be valid
reasons for the saying of them. They are
appropriate if someone was asked to drink a glass full of an unknown dark
liquid. The words ~ would not ~ indicates
wisdom, while the words ~ could not ~ indicates fear.
This
is not to say that one should be foolhardy or reckless when limits are cast
aside, but rather to look at all activities as a possibility of doing under
certain circumstances.
If
I were asked to do hang gliding, I would say, “No, Thank you,” but if it were
the only way to escape from a life-threatening situation, I would welcome the
opportunity. Therefore, it is wise for
me, when asked, “Have you ever done hang gliding?” to respond with the words
“Not yet” as this accustoms my mind to the possibility of doing it.
While
if I were to reply, “No, I could never do that,” I would be building fear from
which it could be extremely difficult to extract myself, even if under life
threatening conditions this was the only possible means of escape. Now when I see hang gliding on television,
instead of my past response of quickly turning to another channel while saying
the “can never do” words, I now say firmly my new phrase “I can do it.”
Avoid limiting
yourself. Several months ago, the
baseball world was lamenting the fact that a young, exceptionally good pitcher,
had to have his left elbow operated on and would thus be unable to play for the
season. He was quoted as saying that his
elbow had hurt since he first started playing baseball and that he always knew
that someday that he would have trouble with it and would need a complicated
operation. He put limits on
himself. He affirmed for a condition and
it became so.
There is a joy and a proud
feeling when one has accomplished something, whether not done previously or repeatedly
doing that which is a challenge.
A
rousing, invigorating proclamation of “I did it, by golly, I did it!” is the
fuel that will invigorate one for years.
It was just after college,
that un- athletic, often-sick me became determined to take a Red Cross canoe
course in which it was required that I get both out of the canoe and then in
again while in the middle of the lake, without upsetting the canoe. The knowledge that through perseverance I
learned to do it and passed the test has helped me get through a wide variety
of happenings in the years thereafter; although none involved either a canoe or
water.
If
one has doubts about her/his ability to do something, a statement to one’s self
(or to others if needed,) of, “If I did (whatever?) before, then I can
certainly do this now.” will make all sorts of actions possible.
People should do the things
that will make themselves proud of themselves because accomplishing
accomplishments can transform one’s life.
“Beware
of False Pride” is an old saying, yet, also of merit is ~ “Beware of False
Modesty.”
When
people are praised for an accomplishment and they respond with, “Oh, it was nothing.” or the reverse response, “Oh,
no, I'm not worthy of your praise.” They
are insulting the person who gave the compliment. It is the same as saying “You don't know what
you are talking about” or “Your judgment is poor if you can say that about poor
little me.”
Always
a good response to a compliment, a speaking of the truth about something that
was done, are the simple words, “Thank you” or “Yes, I am proud of myself for
having done that.”
The
purpose of the entry this month is transformation. In the springtime, plants are rising out of
the ground, they may look the same as they did last year but each has grown in
some way. So too can each of us grow and
change, thus transforming our lives by cutting the ties that bind us to
limiting thoughts and actions.
