Goodbye 2015, You Are Leaving Too Soon

     Yesterday was February, now is December, what happened to all those months, days and hours between then and now?

     I know that it is traditional to leave after 12 months, but I would certainly be appreciative if you departed from tradition to insert, at least, another week into the end of December or, perhaps add a new little month.  If Julius Caesar can add two full months in the middle of the summer ~ July for himself and for his son, Augustus, August ~ then why can I not add a skinny little one at the bottom end of the year?

     The calendar, before Julius, is seen in some of the month names ~ September ~ Sept means 7, October ~ Oct means 8, an octopus has eight tentacles.  November ~ 9, as Novena, a form of worship lasting nine days.  December ~ 10 as in decimal.

      The new little month could be named December Jr. or 
Dec-Jan.  Better yet would be a distinctive name all its own.  After serious thought, I wonder about the name ~ Gratitude ~ but later thinking, it seems that the logical solution is a layered system.  Continue December seven more days, 32nd, 33rd, 34th, 35th, 36th 37th and 38th.

     The new year is always depicted as a baby, so it probably would not even notice if a week was taken from it.

     With the layered system, while people are doing all the projects they had wanted to complete before year's end, Baby New Year could have been quietly born and have a week of quiet, thus being better prepared for all the whoop-de-do and noise people make when they know of its arrival, as was done when you, 2015, first arrived.  Have you ever wondered why people do this for, or perhaps, a better word would be ~ to ~ all Baby New Years, but never make all that racket when their own babies are born, they want quietness to prevail.

     Dear 2015, I have so very many 'manys' for which to thank you as I quietly do purposely alone each year for all the years.  Top among them is that I have lived another year.  As you know, I have been affirming for many years to live to 100 years and be in excellent health, both mentally and physically, however, recently, I have raised that age to 125 years as there are so many books to finish and inventions for which to do prototypes and ~ ~ ~

     2015, while you may not be physically here, so to speak, I will not forget you.

     Before you depart, please leave a message for Baby New Year to get as soon as understanding is possible.

     Greetings, Baby New Year, there are some 'things' that 2015 gave to me and alas millions of people that were more than enough, so you do not need to give anymore unwanted, unpleasant, painful, life threatening challenges. 

     Therefore 2016, you can just concentrate on providing pleasant, prosperous and interesting challenges ~ ~ ~ And happy, healthy experiences, heavily sprinkled over with love.  For all this and more 2016

~ We All Thank You In Advance ~

Avoid Conceited Gift Giving

     As I sat with my parents and sister in our church each Sunday, a nearby large beautiful stained glass window was my main focus successfully getting me through many dull sermons.

     It was not just the sweet little lamb in front of a flowering shrub in the lower left corner, (I named her Laura Lamb) but my indignation at the bold words in the glass across the bottom of the window.  "Given in loving memory of her sister by Mary Stewart White" (Not her name).

     Every Sunday, I inwardly told Mary exactly what I thought of someone as conceited as she, wanting everyone to know of her generosity and not notice that she disliked her sister, for, of course, the inscription should have been ~ Given in loving memory of Lucy Stewart by her sister ~. 

     I imagined a wealthy (in money only) pampered, middle-aged woman.  Unfortunately, Mary is typical of a great many people.  Nevertheless, Mary reverse inspired me to do in-person nice acts for people without telling them my name. 

     An especially rewarding experience was when I drove to distant clients, or to visit family or friends, was to arrange my trips so that I could be in a rural area on a Sunday morning.  I looked for and stopped at a poor, little, often one-room protestant church with people entering it.  I told them that I was just passing through the area, then went in and sat in the back pew, often just a chair adjacent to a side aisle  so I could leave easily if I wished.  In my purse, I had several different colored, sealed envelopes, each containing a different amount of money.  I did not put anything in the collection plate.  Then depending on how friendly they were to me, before and after the service, and whether I liked the service, I would select an envelope and give it to the minister, leaving before he opened it.  Along with the money, I had a note with just three words on it, ~ Love from Joan.

     At one church, where I was the only Caucasian there, they gave me an especially warm welcome.  One matronly woman appointed herself as my guide, and sat beside me to find the hymns in the hymn book, and give loud whispered instructions.  There were no looks of disappointment when I failed to put anything in the collection plate.

     The minister welcomed me to the church, and everyone seconded the welcome, turning to smile a personal greeting to me.

     After the service, everyone spoke to me and I received three invitations to come for dinner.  Although tempted, these people had little money, and I did not want to eat their hard-earned food, so I declined, saying that I was expected elsewhere.

     Before I left, I shook hands with everyone and asked the minister to walk with me to my car as I explained about the envelopes.  Then I got into the car, started the engine, and handed him all the envelopes and drove away.  The contents of the envelopes totaled fifty dollars, which, at that time, was a lot of money for me, but I knew that for this group of people, it would be almost a fortune.

     I had noted the minister's name, as well as that of the church and its address.  When I returned home and told my parents of my experience, Mother went into action.  Soon there was more cash in an envelope with a note "Love from Joan's Family," which my Father mailed from New York City, as well as a sizeable package with a duplicate note; neither had a return address.  I, of course, used a pretty note card to thank them all for their warm welcome.  Mother was always clever about the things she put into gift packages for "the less fortunate."  This one contained a variety of nice things with which to decorate the church in various seasons.

  ~ Enjoy in-person anonymous gift giving. ~

 

Joan Eastman-Bennett

Create A Thanks ~ Full Box

     Much in one's life these days is temporary, "Here today, gone tomorrow," as the age-old saying states.

~ While a Thanks ~ Full Box Lasts a Life Time

 

     It is akin to a Memory Box, except that prior to placing anything in this box, there are some ritual words to be said.

 

     In a quiet time, with the box open in front of you, hold the object, the new entry, and say aloud, 'I am thankful for this (name the what-it-is) because ~ ~ ~ ~.  Take time to remember in detail why you are thankful.

 

      Often what is put in the box is in a representative form, for how can you put your Mother in the box except with a photograph.
 

     This is also a worthwhile experience for a family with children of any age, the recently-born can be included in a photograph showing the family sitting on the floor around The Thanks ~ Full Box.

 

     Generally the box is a plastic storage box with a snap on lid that provides safe, dry storage as long as the lid is kept securely down.

 

     Make a nice big label, for the top handmade preferably; ask a grand-parent to do it for the Thanks ~ Full Box; some future time  you will perhaps get misty-eyed when seeing it.  There can be other labels put on one end and one side inside box facing out.

 

     Store the box in the back of a deep closet, if there are children, put the box high on a shelf, they should be instructed that The Thanks ~ Full Box is never to be opened by them unless the family is together.

     Make a starter Thanks ~ Full Box as a unique Christmas or anytime gift for someone you know really well.

     First, an explanation then the words to be said.

     Start with a "gift card" explanation, perhaps written in an appropriate themed greeting card attached to a ribboned bow attached to the top.  Be certain to tell of the words to be said.

     Put in the box as the starters, a postcard of some places you went together, a menu from their favorite restaurant, ~ ~ ~. 

     Remember this is a starter for them, avoid giving them things thereafter, for it.

 

 

  Having A Thanks ~ Full Box

Can Be A Forever Joy ~

I Avoid Thoughtless & Cruel Halloween "Decorations."

 

    

     During this festive, fun Halloween time, not needed are so-called decorations of mock tombstones that thoughtless house owners put out on their front lawns.  These are reminders of all the people who have died in wars, floods, hurricanes, tornados, wildfires, crime and from other causes, who now lie adjacent to their own tombstones, or the ones killed on 9/11 whose remains were never found and hence have no tombstones.

 

     Worst yet, are the thoughtless people who think that having a human form or skeleton with its neck in a noose hanging from a tree is decoration?

 

     Every year, hundreds of people and all who know them, are painfully reminded of how a family member, a friend or an acquaintance killed himself.

 

     Certainly the father and his young son who were enjoying a walk together in a scenic wooded reservation about twelve years ago, do not like to be reminded of what the little boy saw, then pointed to as he asked his father about "it" hanging from a tree branch, ~ my nephew's best friend, the twenty-two year old son of family friends.

 

     I do not like to be annually reminded in any way of my nephew's anguish and the great sadness and grief of our friends.

 

     And why is a bloodied human form considered a Halloween decoration?  It is doubtful that any of the service men and women returning from overseas duty would be amused by any such "display;" they need to forget all the bloodied bodies that they have seen, rather than being confronted and mocked by the fake bloody human looking forms often seen on front of house grass.

 

     What kind of parents would want to expose their children to this kind of horror?

 

     Witches, ghosts, goblins, cobwebs, black cats and grinning pumpkins are fun and appropriate, they are not distressful to neighbors and people who walk or drive by.

     In a recent early November, a missing man was found lying next to a Halloween display on the front porch of a house whose owners always used a back door entrance.

     The police asked the mailman why he had not reported the dead man.  He said he thought the man, clad in blue jeans and a long sleeved plaid shirt, was just part of the decorations, many places had realistic men dressed like that, most were bloody; he tried not to look at them.

     It is not just bad weather that a postman has to endure these days but people with a bad sense of what is amusing.

 

     Speak or send a letter to those thoughtless people who have the cruel displays, and firmly request that they remove and discard them.

 

     Use this write-up as a basis for letters that you send to your local and city newspapers, as well as the mayors of your and nearby towns and cities so that soon all towns will have an ordinance forbidding anyone for any reason to have any cruel, thoughtless so called "displays."

 

~ My Halloween decorations are always fun and appropriate ~

~ For Success, Use With-Legs Words ~

    I had spent fifteen minutes explaining to my ninety-year old friend, Mary Lou Clarke, the importance of avoiding the words ~ hope and try.
     She thought for a time, then said slowly, "Oh, I see, the words do not have any legs under them."
     "Legs?" I questioned.
     "Without legs," she replied, "they can not move."
     A truly wonderful and accurate explanation!
     Such words as dream, hope, if, maybe, perhaps, pray, try and wonder are No-Legs words.
     I overheard an excellent example in a store.  One woman said to another, "If my husband ever makes any money, maybe, someday, perhaps, we could ~ ."  Her complaining affirmations can only delay, if not stop, the wished for project.
     Plan the project, do not wait for the money (or whatever is needed) to come before detailing the venture.  A famous quote, "Step out in faith, knowing that that for which you affirm will become so."  Stepping out in faith, proclaiming it, knowing with a certainty that it will become so ~ makes it become so ~ if, of course, it is for the highest good of all concerned.
     Are you one of those people who say, "I've been sort of dreaming about someday maybe going to a Caribbean Island during the winter sometime."  Focus, direct your attention to the project.  Look at a calendar, decide on feasible dates.  Read books about the subject, write your itinerary, make a list of the clothes and things that you will take with you and purchase something to be used only for the trip.  Be exact in your affirmations.  For example, "Next February 3rd. I will be flying to Barbados for an enjoyable two-week vacation."  Purchase a manila envelope, then on both sides write the trip destination in bold black letters.  Devise a system to get money into the envelope.  For example, every time you get change that includes three five dollar bills, put one into the trip envelope saying firmly with conviction, "This is for my trip to Barbados next February."  Avoid saying No-Legs sentences such as, "This will never be enough."
~ For it is the intent that brings about reality.
     I heard about a woman, Helen, who suddenly began to have increasingly strong feelings that she should go to Egypt, although she had never traveled or ever been especially interested in doing so.  She was a single mother on a tight budget, even so, she purchased a large map of Egypt and laid it out on the dining room table.  She and her two sons began to read and to focus on Egypt.  One of the children did a school project on Egypt.  Helen started saying regularly to herself and others, "I don't know how I'm going to get to Egypt, but I will get there."  The children told many, "Mom's going to Egypt."
     Several months later, about a week and a half before a school vacation, she received a telephone call from a history teacher in another town.  Helen was told that a group of students was going on a trip to Egypt for two weeks and that one of the chaperons had just notified them that she was unable to go.  They were frantically looking for a replacement, but everyone they had telephoned had other plans.  Was there any chance that she would like to go to Egypt?  Someone had told him that Helen was good with children.  The caller proceeded to tell Helen that there would be no expense to her, only what she might want to use for stray meals or to purchase gifts.
     While she was recovering from this amazing news, a friend telephoned to tell Helen that during school vacation, she, her husband and their son were going to their vacation house and to invite Helen's two sons to go with them.  When told of the trip, the friend said that they would be glad to keep the boys another week.
     Helen worked in a school office so she already had one week of vacation and knew that she should be able to get another week.  Then her neighbor came over and asked if she could borrow Helen's cat for a few days while her granddaughter was visiting.  Suddenly, within an hour's time, Helen was going to Egypt and everything was arranged!  ~ And ~ none of those people knew of Helen's Egyptian Affirmations.
     Some With-Legs Words are: absolutely, can, definitely and will.
     One more wonderful quote from my friend, Mary Lou Clarke, who is always so interested in hearing about my many and varied projects.  "You have feet under your dreams."

Make certain that the words, phrases and sentences that you say

are not the sitting or lying down variety

but are rather the type With-Legs (and/or feet)

and that they move. 

Do You Honor Yourself?

     The word ~ Honor ~ may seem an old fashioned word and concept ~ ~ 18th century men engaged in a duel with swords or pistols willing to face death in order to defend their honor.

     "But what, you may be asking, "does that have to do with me in this modern age?"

     There is no time limit on Honor, it is ageless.

     Another word for the concept of honoring one's self is ~ Respect ~.  There are two parts
          1 ~ Insist on Respect from others.
          2 ~ Insist that you Respect yourself.

     Friend Ruth and I met for supper, then attended an opening night production of a local Little Theater Group.

     When the curtain opened, an actor walked across the stage speaking such foul, vulgar words that the entire audience gasped in shock.  As the play progressed, all the actors spoke in that manner.

     After less than ten minutes, I told Ruth rather more loudly than expected, ~ "I am leaving, I will not allow anyone to dishonor me as they are doing."

     Ruth said she would stay as she did not want to hurt the actors feelings by leaving.

     I told her that they had no feeling or they would not have disrespected themselves in this way.

     As I neared the door, I was surprised to see that the cashier had come out from behind her table and handed me cash, the amount of the ticket; as she did so, she said "I am glad to give this back, I told them not to waste time on such filth even if the new director wanted it.  And I'm resigning, I don't want to even be near people who talk like that."

     I waited until I was outside to stop to put on my coat, as I was doing so, people began to come out the door, each of whom stopped to thank me for making them aware of the Honoring One's Self concept.

     Ruth telephoned me the next day to say that she had stayed until intermission, then she had waited near the door to see if anyone else would leave, and everyone had except for three people sitting together at the front

     Why had they stay?  In doing so, they were dishonoring themselves.

     Dishonoring one's self could be going to a party and drinking too much, excusing doing so by saying to yourself, "I don't want to hurt my host's feelings by not taking a refill when he keeps coming around and offering.  You could say to yourself or out loud, "I could do that, but it would be dishonoring myself to do so."

Make certain to

make Respect for yourself

a major part of your life.

Click. . .Click, I Do Not Know What That Is?

     That statement almost guarantees that the source of the sound will never be known because a negative "do not know" was initially stated.

     The words "do not know" are door-closers to the mind, leaving no space for the truth to be discovered.

     All such words are an insult to the speaker for proclaiming failure before even trying.

     A simple "What is that?" or better yet "What is the source of or reason for that sound?" triggers the mind to go into its private detective mode.

     Detectives ask many questions both inwardly and outwardly of others to discern the truth.

     When an unwelcome situation appears in your life, do you lament, "Oh no! I don't know what to do?"

     Now look what you have done to your Mind Detective! Not just once, but twice, a double negative ~ "no" and "don't"; two major mind-blockers to finding the correct and best solution.

     Now you know when the next Life Question arrives to firmly state ~ "What is the best way to resolve this situation?"

     Between those times, regularly compliment your mind ~

"I know with certainty

that my inner clever detective

will bring forth the proper questions

that will result in the needed answers"  

Joan Eastman-Bennett

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

The Only Jumping I Do Is For Joy

     There is a monkey, a squirrel and a rat racing up to the top of a coconut tree, which one do you think will get to the bananas first?

     Of the many people asked this question, 98% answered incorrectly, by saying that it was the monkey.  How did you respond?  If you also guessed ~ the monkey ~ reread this blog's title and the question.

     Or did you join me in the 11/2 %, who immediately knew that the question was not valid because bananas do not grow on coconut trees.  The remaining 1/2% of people said one of the other animals.

     Those animal people (not you, of course) jumped to a conclusion before listening to the end.

     One astute woman said, after she learned the correct answer, "I believe that I and all the other people who said the monkey were unconsciously connecting monkeys and bananas.  This is a good illustration of the role that our unconscious mind influences our decision making."  Indeed a wise woman.  Thank you bank teller Kate.

     Many of those 98% people often wonder why their lives take so many unexpected turns, rarely realizing that they had acted or reacted to information that they had not listened or read to the end; they had impatiently jumped to a conclusion before the conclusion.

     Then there are the people who when in conversation with you, rarely allow you to complete even a sentence without interrupting, saying when you complain, "That's all right, I know what you are going to say," then proceed to right angle turn the intent of your thought.

     There is a famous Pennsylvania Dutch (originally "deutsch" German for the word meaning german) sentence, using that language's sentence structure ~ "He threw his mother from the train, ~ ~ the jumpers would have had ~ him ~ arrested and jailed without waiting to learn the whole sentence ~

     "He threw his mother from the train, a kiss."

Get your life's "Kisses"

by avoiding

any conclusion jumping.

Is Your Underwear Harming Your Body?

     This is an important question for both women and men.

     Through many years, the people on South Pacific Islands wore only a wrap-around covering on their lower bodies.

     Europeans learned of this mode of dressing primarily through the paintings of the French painter Paul Gauguin.

     The paintings came to the attention of various Christian clergy, who were horrified at the shameful immodesty of the bare-breasted women; so missionaries were sent forth to convert the people they considered obviously heathen' to the Christian way of religious thinking.

     These Victorian virgins persuaded the converted Christians to cover their breasts with clothing.

     In addition, converts were not to engage in any of the many nifty, enjoyable ways to have sexual intercourse.  The only allowed way was with the woman on her back and the man on top of her, which is why this position has been termed by many people through the years as the missionary position.

     The British started towns along the coast and soon trained, then employed, the "native" women to work for them, thus requiring them to wear European heavy, tight clothes.

     It was an astute British doctor (name unknown) on one of the islands, who made a major medical discovery after observing women with breast cancer, British women and the "native" women both the workers in town and those who did not work.  There had never been any breast cancer among the "native" women, but the rate for the other workers was the same as the British women.

     The wise doctor concluded that the difference was that the women who wore the breast-restrictors were the ones getting breast cancer.  The tightness restricted the necessary circulation in the breasts; but fashion and custom prevailed and the bras became even tighter and breast cancer rates have risen. 

     In these modern times, it is Dr. Oz who repeatedly speaks about the dangers of tight bras.  He stresses the need to at least, remove a bra as soon as one gets home from work or as often as possible.

     Dr. Oz also warns of the dire consequences to a woman of sleeping on her stomach, of wearing a sleep bra and the health hazards of under wired bras.

     The author of a recent book on the many hidden dangers in people's lives currently said that the underwire in bras is nickel, which is toxic, especially near heat.

     Known for many decades is that the healthiest fabric to use for underpants is cotton because it allows air flow, unlike man-made fabrics.  This "breathable" fabric does not hold in body heat, a condition that fosters a variety of unwanted, very uncomfortable infections.

     Many couples wanting to have a baby have been unsuccessful, not because of any problem with the woman, but rather a low sperm count.  Men are advised to avoid hot tubs and hold-in-heat outer pants, especially jeans.

     As the numbers of cases of prostate cancer continue to rise, there is the should-be-obvious connection between that cancer and the advent of slim, tight jeans and tight briefs worn under them.

     Like breasts or any part of the body, the prostate requires good circulation to remain healthy.

     Loose types of underpants, like boxer shorts, are preferable to many types of constricting briefs.

     In the 1990's, at a European Medical conference, the results of a major study proved that many prostate cancers were caused by constrictive clothing.

     Like the harmful wearing of the sleep-bra is the unwise habit of many women, many men sleep in the tight briefs they have worn all day, thus never allowing any freedom of natural movement within any part of that area.  It is better to wear loose pajama pants, but best yet authorities say, is for both men and women are loose night shirts to fully allow for good air and "inner juices" circulation.

     Before deciding whether to pursue fashion or the good health route, talk with or read detailed accounts of people who have those types of cancer.

    ~ Is Your Underwear Harming Your Body? ~

Are You Polite And Respectful To Yourself?

     No doubt you would be surprised or annoyed or dismayed or angry if someone was to say to you ~ "You're stupid," "Idiot," "loser," "you never do anything right," and "no one likes you."

     These are only a few of the dreadful comments typical of what far too many people regularly say to themselves.

     You can not control what others say, but you can control what you say to yourself.

     Regularly said words and phrases are affirmations, and affirmations become reality.

     Do you really want what you have been repeatedly affirming for yourself?

    In my work as a Life Improvement Advisor, one of my clients had two major concerns ~ ~ that she was not as efficient in her work as she had previously been and that people seemed to be avoiding her.

     Knowing that often situations come into being by what is said, I advised Allison, to purchase a small plain black covered note book with a small attached pen, then to start wearing clothes with a pocket into which the note book could hide when not in use, yet readily be available.

     The note book's purpose is so that she can note any phrases that she uses (says or thinks) that contain the word ~ I ~ as well as single derogative words.  (Add the date and time to each entry.)

     "I will do as you suggest," Allison said, "but I don't know how this could possibly solve my problems."

     Just four days later, Allison telephoned to tell me ~ "I wrote the Affirmation you gave me in the front of my new little black note book, I had hardly finished doing so, when I realized what I had just said to myself ~ 'I'll never remember to do this; 'This won't help me.'  Before I even got to the office, I had six entries.  As you advised, I said the affirmation to myself just as I entered, and for the first time, I really heard myself saying all of what you call Lethal Words, my note book is almost filled."

     There are two kinds of Lethal Word/Phrase speakers ~ those who know what they are saying but do not realize the harm of doing so and then the other people like Allison who are unaware of the lethal words they say because they have said them so often that it has become an automatic response.

     It is usually easier to replace or substitute than it is to eliminate, besides in the case of Lethal Words, the damage done needs to be repaired with a strong dose of positive affirmations, such as, 'I am a smart person,' 'I am proud of myself,' 'you did a good job.'

     Do not wait for others to compliment you, inwardly tell yourself complimentary words.

     If you drop something, substitute your usual "Clumsy" with a simple "Whoops" unless there is major damage, then another response is needed, but speaking harshly of yourself will not help the situation in the slightest

     Following my advice, Allison explained to her co-workers what she had learned, asked for their help in discovering the "put down" words she said to herself and apologize to them for having to listen for so long.  In helping her, many of them discovered needed changes in their own vocabulary.

 

I use positive words and phrases

that indicate the fact that

I am always polite and respectful to myself.  

Do You Know The Other Side Of Yourself?

     Look closely at your life, have you always done what is termed "usual."?

     What talents and abilities lie in the never seen deep shadows of your every day life?

     Have you dared to be daring?  Not a risky or dangerous or illegal or immoral type of dare, but rather what might be usual in the lives of other people, just not in yours.

     It is smugly gratifying to do, at least several times in your life, an activity that results in family, friends and even new acquaintances to exclaim in astonishment
"Wow, I can't believe you did that!!!"

     Two, of many, such occurrences in my life were:
     1~  During college, I had the opportunity to learn to milk a cow, although never thought of before.  I joined a Dairy Club, learned how to groom a cow, Debbie, then to show her in a judged Dairy Show;  a unique and enjoyable experience for someone raised in suburbs. 

     2~  Many years later, I regularly taught at a large Adult School, whose brochure listed a multitude of different courses.  At the beginning of each semester, I checked the brochure to see where my courses were listed, in so doing, I kept seeing a course on Belly Dancing.  One such encounter, followed by my usual sarcastic, "Why would any one want to do that?!" brought forth from my Inner Self, the surprising words, "Why not you?"

     "Ridiculous!" replied my every day self.  Upon further thought however, I dared myself to take the course, not telling any one about doing so except Mora, who I convinced to go with me despite her reluctance.  The result, I did poorly, possibly because   I laughed so much at my mirrored reflection, but I learned a basic move that is a good waist thinner.

     However, Mora did so well that the instructor hired her to preform together.  Mora dared to take the course, thus discovered a talent that she had no idea that she possessed.

     After hearing one of my talks, a man laughingly dared himself to take a knitting course, which he expected to be boring, but found it so interesting that he soon became an expert in intricately patterned sweaters of his own design.  This talent led to a small business of individually custom designed and knitted sweaters for people glad to pay well.

     A dare is one you quietly make to yourself, never one put forth by someone else. 

     A true dare is done alone,

     stepping out into an unknown

     to make it an in-known. 

     ~ Find Some Of The Other Sides Of Yourself ~

 

~ Dare To Be Daring ~

Count The Blessings That YOU Have Been To Others

     An often heard, famous quote is ~ "Count your blessings," in other words, all for which one is thankful.

     Equally as important as what comes in to you is what you send or give to others, whether people, places, plants, animals, insects, buildings and all matter of "things."

     In both my office and in personal files I long ago established Pink File folders labeled ~ ~

     ~Nice Letters For Discouraging Days~ 

 

     Recently, while belatedly doing long overdue filing, I encountered many lovely, loving thank you cards to add to my personal Pink File Folder.  Within the folder were numerous others that were out of my current realm of consciousness.

 

     While so engaged, I realized the many merits of everyone having a Pink File that contains letters, cards and notes all thanking for a thoughtful gift or a thoughtful something that had been given or done.

 

     Also, when someone unexpectedly compliments with special words, neatly write it with the date, then put that in the folder.

 

     When reading the contents of my Pink Folder, I found that I was repeatedly saying to myself "That was nice of me," and glad that I had obviously been a blessing to that person. 

 

     A Pink Folder triggers good memories of people and places, always important at any stage of one's life.

 

     'Your Pink Folder is just for you, so keep it in an out-of-the-way place, but do the kindnesses that will generate written thank you's to add to your folder.

 

     ~Count The Blessings That YOU Have Been To Others~

 



Deflecting Questions You Do Not Want To Answer

     "Just because someone asks you a question, does not mean that you have to answer it if you do not want to do so."  advised John Thomas Reid.

     "Most people feel obligated to answer even when they do not like either the question or the person asking the question."

     Of course, there are some legal and medical questions that require an answer, but those are not the annoying ones.

     It was in a supermarket that I overheard a woman standing nearby say to another, "I still can't believe what Betty asked me yesterday, I didn't want to tell her, but what could I do?"

     So I told them John's advice and what she could have done.

     1 ~ Do not answer, instead in a pleasant tone ask a simple question of her.  ~ "Why do you ask?"

     This unexpected response usually results in a flustered response of, "er, a, um, well."

  You can quickly follow that by firmly stating, "Tell me, I really want to know." ~ If you do want to know.

     Or if you have no interest in her reasons because what she asked is none of her business but you still want to maintain a relationship with her.
     2 ~ Change the subject quickly.

     Say something like, "I heard a clever riddle that I know you will appreciate, what stays in one corner but can travel around the world?  I know with your love of travel (if she does) you would like this, the answer is ~ a stamp.  Isn't that clever?"  Then ask her about her vacation, a subject most people enjoy describing.
     3 ~ Leave, just simply say 'I must leave now.'  Then do so, no matter what she says.

                                                               

 

     I was in a store when I encountered a woman who had taken one of my adult school courses several years earlier.  After greetings, she said, "May I ask you a question?"

     "Yes" I answered.

     "How old are you?"

     I told her that I affirmed that all was well in her life.

     She asked "Aren't you going to answer my question?"

     Aha, there is now another question that will often distract from the first one.

     I answered, "No."

     "But I just asked you."

     "You asked if you could ask me a question, to which I said yes you could ask me a question.  You did not ask if I would answer the question that you next asked.

     "Well, will you answer my question?"

     "Which one?" I responded.

     "Oh, never mind, nice to see you." she said as she went on her way.

 

 

You Need Not Answer All The Questions

That You Are Asked

I Am Your Brain, Why Are You Sabotaging Me?

     How would you like it if you had important thoughts and ideas to tell, but you were never given an opportunity to get a sentence or even a word out, before you were drowned, by voices and/or music (usually with words) of others?

     Why do you consider what comes from the brains of other people to be superior to me, your very own wonderful Brain?

     Your lack of respect for my multitude of knowledge and talents is difficult to believe.

     How can you know of the music, the meaningful information for others, the poetry and all the other aspects of me, if you always smother me?

     I need times of quietness, not bombardment.  In quiet times, you can ask me to make known to you your many past lives for you have had them and aspects of some carry over into your current life whether you believe it or not.

     You sleep with a radio turned on, the television is set to act as your alarm clock in the morning and share your breakfast time, before turning it off, you put that dreadful, very harmful to me, 'thing' with the electromagnetic fields, close to me  on one of your ears so that I will not have even a second of time alone with you.

     And so it continues all day, in your car or public transportation, people talking, but never, ever any us-time.

     If you keep insulting me, I will start retreating within, some will term it "memory loss," but there is nothing wrong with my memory, it is the years of being unwanted except for selected duties.

     Soon I will hibernate deep within myself
         where no one will ever be able to find me again ~ but know
              that I, your Brain, tried,
                                  I really tried ~
                                         but you never listened,
                                                           you never ever
                                                                            listened.